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forcing myself to grow. i hate public speaking.

March24
forcing myself to grow. i hate public speaking.

I don’t think this image could be more perfect. I feel like sometimes I should be changing and growing personally and professionally at a natural rate (like that of the human body), but it doesn’t always work that way (Sometimes, I have to force myself to grow).

Unlike our physiological makeup, our professions, hobbies, muscles, and sometimes even relationships will not grow to the best they can be without a little extra push from ourselves. I think this is how it should be! If we didn’t have to push ourselves to be the best we can be in all areas of life, everyone would be absolutely amazing at everything. At that point, their would be no competition in life, no reasons to try harder, and life would be equal for the lazy and non lazy alike. I think the ‘Pushing yourself to grow’ mindset works like a filter between the people that want ‘it’ (whatever the word “it” is) but think ‘it’s unattainable (so the don’t try) and the people that will do anything to get their ‘it’.

I feel like this mindset is an invisible field that doesn’t even need to be talked about, we can just tell when someone is either more motivated or less motivated than we are. It says a lot about a person if you know they have succeeded in areas of their life that may not come to them easily. I strive for this mindset everyday (be the best I can, even in extremely difficult situations)! The following example may help explain this idea:

I HATE public speaking…and I am forcing myself to do it, to improve myself, for myself. There are a lot of ‘myself’s in that last sentence, and that’s because no one else is going to make me better, it’s up to me. I have an opportunity right now to contract out with a business that I used to manage the sales team for, Computer Hardware Inc. I am assisting them with their educational sales across the state of Nebraska. The main role that I have for Computer Hardware, is providing group demonstrations (public speaking) about a product called ‘mimio interactive‘ (an interactive whiteboard of sorts for schools and businesses).

Every time I do a demonstration with an organization, school, or business, Computer Hardware gets exclusive rights to sell the mimio products to this customer for life. This is a big deal! It means that the more places I do demonstrations, the more sales Computer Hardware will have forever without doing a lot of additional foot work.

Now this sounds like an awesome deal for Computer Hardware (It is, and I only bill them an hourly rate of $15 an hour), so why am I involved with a company that I am technically ‘working’ for, at an inexpensive hourly rate, doing something that I hate? The main reason is because I HATE public speaking! [The other reasons, they're like family to me and it puts cash in my pocket]
How do people get better at things in life that they aren’t good at…They practice. That is exactly what I’m doing, forcing myself to practice to become a better public speaker.

I don’t have to do this job. There are plenty of people in the state of Nebraska that would like to be hired as a sales rep for Computer Hardware. And I could very easily avoid public speaking for the rest of my life (just making up excuses about “having something to go to” every time it came up).  But, I know that I am going to be someone, someday, that will need to have great communication skills in personal and public settings, and this a chance for me to get a head start on the practice I need.

How long will I do the public speaking demonstrations for Computer Hardware? I’ve asked myself that question many times and I decided that it depends on my public speaking comfort level (if I’m super comfortable, I’ll stop), if the demos stop coming to me (and I’m not getting enough practice, I will need to find another avenue to get the time in), or if I’m ready to find other opportunities that are a bigger challenge for me than public speaking, then I will stop.

To sum it up, I will always push myself to grow and if I sense something stagnate or underdeveloped in my life, I will make the much needed change (no matter how painful it may be). I must be the best I can be, for my businesses, my wife, and myself! I’ll let you know how it’s going in a couple months or so…Until then, push the fears my way (except for the shark attacks, you can keep them…Yikes ;) !

Remember if you do not keep yourself moving, you will become stagnate and rotten.
I Challenge you to have an awesome day & to push yourself to be better in an area that you know you struggle in.
~Chais Meyer

9 Comments to

“forcing myself to grow. i hate public speaking.”

  1. On March 25th, 2009 at 5:35 am Alan Lukachko Says:

    If there is a Toastmaster’s group in your area, it would be worthwhile to join. I was a member for about 3 years in the early 1970s.

    Every week we had one minute to prepare a talk on a random topic that only gave us one minute to prepare. Then we talked about the topic for one minute. It forced us to think on our feet. Also there was a structure of preparing and giving 5-10 minute talks on various themes. I think there were about a dozen in the manual we used.

    For me it built confidence and sharpened my mine when talking to people one on one. One day I spoke to over 3,000 people at a weekend conference. I highly recommend Toastmmasters.

  2. On March 25th, 2009 at 8:04 am Chais Says:

    Alan,

    Thank you for your comment! I did join a Toastmaster’s group in Kearney, Nebraska about a year and a half ago. I personally found excuse after excuse to get out of the group (probably because it was forcing me to grow and I wasn’t ready for it). I really did like the concept of ‘thinking on your feet presenting’, I think I will look into that again.

    Thank you again for bringing this to my mind! I appreciate it!
    Have an Awesome Day.
    ~Chais Meyer

  3. On March 25th, 2009 at 8:20 am Thomas Hiatt Says:

    Very good post Chais…it gets kinda of tough to do the things you’re not good at or comfortable with. It takes the kind of push and motivation you’re talking about to do them. I was pressured/pushed to go out for Speech in High School. I’m glad I went out because it got me out of my comfort zone and forced me to speak in front of people. Keep doing your thing and you’ll start to become better and more comfortable. I think you would be a great Public Speaker for any company…

  4. On March 25th, 2009 at 11:22 am Lisa Braithwaite Says:

    Congratulations on facing your demons! It’s so difficult to do what you’re doing, to force yourself to work on something that is so uncomfortable for you. But if we only stuck with the things we like and are good at, we’d never grow. And life without growth and challenge is too sad and boring to even think about.

  5. On March 25th, 2009 at 11:32 am Erin Melenbacker Says:

    Congrats on getting out of the comfort box! I am totally an introvert by nature so I get how you feel every time you speak publicly. But, in our business at least, I really believe it’s so important to be willing to step out of our comfort zone to be what others need.

    I agree with Thomas, I’m sure you’re a great public speaker :)

  6. On March 25th, 2009 at 12:40 pm Chais Says:

    Thomas,

    Thank you for the compliment! I primarily disagree with standard education (and what they try to teach us) but speech class is one area that I give all educational systems props for. I never did take speech and I think that would have mad a big impact on my life if I would have.

    My cousins are in a private school in Palm Springs and they have been giving speeches in front of their entire class and school since they were in elementary school. They are not afraid of any public situation. It amazes me and that is what I’m striving for.
    ~Chais Meyer

  7. On March 25th, 2009 at 12:44 pm Chais Says:

    Lisa,

    Thank you for your comments and I appreciate the props on facing my demons. You are right on when you say “life without growth and challenge is too sad and boring to even think about”. I see so many of my friends that don’t progress in any way but round (literally, they’re great eaters and that’s about it). It is so sad for me because I know that if they wanted to be the best at something they could. Thank you again for recognizing that and hopefully living it as well.
    ~Chais Meyer

  8. On March 25th, 2009 at 12:46 pm Chais Says:

    Erin,

    From the little I know you, I have been able to tell that you have blossomed with your comfort level in public. You seem to just feel comfortable and relaxed, whether you force yourself or not, that is inspiring to me.

    Thank you as well for the compliment!
    ~Chais Meyer

  9. On March 26th, 2009 at 9:21 am David Lano Says:

    Chais,

    I admire your persistence for personal growth and your aggressive nature in extinguishing fears. Your right, it’s not easy but crutial in ones success. Great post!

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